A couple weeks ago now, I drove down to southeast Michigan to join my family in celebrating grandma’s 85th birthday. Reconnecting with family helped me keep things in perspective despite recent happenings in local, national, and international news.
I was looking forward to seeing grandma, but the occasion was also a great excuse to get away from the local government primaries. By that point, I couldn’t drive too far from home without being reminded of work via campaign signs in peoples’ yards. After I pulled off the highway, I was relieved to find that I didn’t recognize the names of anyone in political advertisements.
Over dinner, grandma told me about a scam call she got a while back. She saw an incoming call from a number she didn’t recognize, picked up the phone, and heard, “Hi grandma, it’s your favorite grandson.” And bless her, she replied, “Zack?” It wasn’t really my voice on the other end, of course, and she figured that out quickly after the caller asked her for $8,000.
As much as I dislike the idea of scammers preying on old folks — especially my grandma — at least this fraud attempt turned into something to bond over. Although I playfully teased my cousins about being the “favorite grandson” after I heard the story, the truth is that grandma probably guessed the call was from me because she’s less familiar with the sound of my voice than some of the other grandchildren.
That lack of familiarity is not really the result of negligence on either of our parts. I’m an only child, and for a variety of reasons — some good and some bad — my late mother was on poor terms with her parents while I was growing up. Since they didn’t get along, I didn’t see grandma very often. It’s been something I’ve been trying to correct in recent years.
I think the feeling is mutual. Grandma has been improving her relationships with her two surviving daughters and her many grandchildren, me included. I think it speaks volumes that Grandma — a devout Catholic who still watches a lot of Fox News — has been so accepting of my transgender cousin. Religious or ideological differences do not need to get in the way of loving her family.
As part of this, grandma invited me back to her place after the family gathering. After grandad passed away, grandma moved into a senior living community, where she still is today. Fortunately, she’s in good health and more autonomous within the community than she was a few years back— her living arrangements are reminiscent of a very nice secondfl oor apartment.
The staff seems to be treating grandma nicely and she’s met some people in the community. During my brief visit she introduced me to a couple of her friends there. We then caught up on events since we last saw each other on Christmas. It’s been an eventful year, so I had plenty to share.
While visiting, I also spoke a bit with my cousin Mercy, who is very much pregnant. Probably by the end of August, she give birth to a son, Arlo, who will be my first “second cousin.” It still seems strange to me, given that I knew Mercy well enough growing up to think of her as a kid like me. But this is a normal part of growing up, I suppose!
